Modern Living

As I was loading up the washing machine with laundry the other day, I thought how interesting it is that despite all these time saving gadgets so many people, including me still cry ‘there’s just not enough time in the day!’ I wonder … perhaps the time is there, only that it’s gobbled up by all the loud, demanding, ‘urgent’ types of tasks, leaving a few crumbs - precious moments for those activities which really nourish the depths of our being. I’m screening and challenging the ‘urgent’ more now and find most things which seem so imperative can actually wait.

Fastest way to feel down

When we compare ourselves to other people whom we perceive to be happier, more attractive, more educated or affluent, we are sure to feel down instantly. It doesn’t take much pondering over or reflection to get a result.

On the other hand it’s also really easy to feel instantly happy too, just by reminding ourselves of all that we do have right now that is good such as health, supportive family and friends etc.

It helps to remember that everyone has problems and that the grass on the other side is never greener - it’s just a different kind of grass.

Charitable Children

Kids are so funny, Harry my four year old nephew wanted to put some coins into the charity box on the shop counter, I didn't have any cash on me at all, being so clever he grabbed the credit card I had used to pay for the ice creams out of my hand and put it into the charity box!!! Luckily I managed to act quickly and got hold of one corner of the card before it disappeared completely into the slot. A very charitable little boy! If either of his parents say they have no money when he's asking for something his reply is 'use your card!' - he's worked out these little pieces of plastic have power!

Patience of Children

After the family get together at the weekend all the children were loaded up into the respective cars and strapped into their car seats. With everything done the grown-ups stood and chatted and a very long goodbye ensued as we enjoyed the evening coolness. Meanwhile the kids aged 6 months to four years sat in their pyjamas under blankets, strangely they just looked on not making a single sound by way of complaint for the delay and the time the adults were taking to wind up and get going. These were the same little ones who had been shouting the house down earlier with their laughter and crying, yet somehow they haven’t yet learnt to be impatient in the manner adults would be when waiting for one another. Given that they had no idea when the conversation would draw to a close and the cars would get moving their patience was a truly amazing sight.

Power of Relaxation

Making a conscious effort to stay relaxed in body and mind has more than the obvious benefits. I’m catching myself noticing more opportunities and making better decisions. I’m picking up more information and details than before in a whole range of situations. Body is more clearly able to sense when something is wrong too. To think all that energy was spent on being tense before! What a waste!

‘I always have a choice’

After much practice, this is a phrase I like to say to myself a lot – as creatures of habit we often forget we have choice in our thinking, our actions and decisions. The unconscious pull of our usual patterns of thinking or behaving cause us to do what we always do and hence we end up with the same old results.

To get different results – do things differently – flexibility is key.

Smile

It’s one of my favourite things to do when I’m out and about, one that’s very heart warming when shared with an appreciating stranger. Giving and receiving a smile changes both people. May be the person receiving a smile will go on to smile at someone else, it has a positive impact on the people watching too – and we are always being watched. Sometimes I wonder how long a chain of smiles could be, may be my smile could come all the way round and back to me ; )

Blue Sky

One of the things I catch myself doing from time to time during the day is stopping and taking a moment to look up at the sky and soak up its amazing beauty. It feels as if wherever I am in the world; outdoors in nature, stuck in a traffic jam surrounded by concrete jungles or simply at home, looking at the sky gives me instant access to nature and the feelings of inspiration and appreciation that come from seeing those stunning colours and patterns.

Don’t be a Slave

‘Don’t ever be a slave to your body, house, family, money, work or any other externals …’

I’m not sure where I came across this quote. It’s a great reminder though to keep things in perspective and not let any particular aspect of our lives take us over, control us, our time, emotions or thoughts, to the point that we forget ourselves and the other things which are important and beneficial to us and our wellbeing. Doing the best we can and then detaching can help us move away from obsessing and towards self mastery.

Red Roses

It’s been a month now since I came back from holiday. Usually the benefits have worn off by the time the laundry has been done and normal routine re-established. This time though things are different. I’m catching myself noticing things I didn’t see before like the stunning red roses in the neighbour’s garden as I drive off in the morning and the formation of the clouds in the evening sky. The rose bushes are quite mature, yet how come they didn’t enter my line of vision last year?

While on holiday I got into a wonderful habit of relishing the moment, just allowing my senses to soak up whatever I was seeing and hearing at the time. Not to be in my head, distracted by thoughts but to really experience that precious moment. I realized the present - this moment now is actually my entire life as the past and future don’t exist. To really ‘live’ my life I need to place attention fully in the present moment. I’m not ‘living’ my life if my mind is absorbed and lost in memories of the past or plans about the future, both have their place, but they can’t hog centre stage all the time. If I’m living the present moment really well, when I reach that time in the future, it too will get all my attention. It’s a very relaxing approach; I’ve noticed the change in muscle tone especially in my feet. Let’s hope it sticks!

Children and Grieving

My three year old nephew Harry sat on my mums bed while she did the ironing. After a while he asked ‘where are nana’s clothes?’ noticing she was only ironing her own. ‘Doesn’t nana love you anymore?’ his little mind trying to make sense of why his grandfather didn’t live with us now. Finally he computed a solution: ‘lets get a ladder nanny then we can go ‘upstairs’ and bring nana back.’

Harry’s ‘let’s get a ladder and fetch nana back’ idea which has gone on for a few weeks came to a head yesterday as my mum told him ‘people who go upstairs to God don’t come back’, hearing this he went straight over to a wall painting depicting a religious figure and started hitting it repeatedly, a strong action for a little boy who isn’t known to be angry.

I wonder how difficult it must be for him as a small child to square the loss of his grandfather.

Past Lives

I’ve always been interested in reincarnation and sometimes asked myself questions like; ‘Where was I a hundred years ago?’, ‘Where will I be in two hundred years from now?’ I can’t remember where I read or heard this meaningful quote that ‘each lifetime is just another chapter in the book of the soul’. Like a story book the same characters show up again and again in the different chapters. I think this is the same for us, people whom we have been connected to before in another time and place showing up again in our current lives. I also believe we carry forward special qualities and talents. So the plot moves on a little more each time as we give where we have previously taken and receive where we have given.

I wrote this post on 29th January, somehow feeling compelled to write on the topic of life and death. The following day on 30th January 2010 Dad passed away suddenly and unexpectedly. Thankfully it was a painless natural death and he did not suffer. Here he is on our last holiday together in India.

Sharpening the Saw

This is a wonderful analogy used by Stephen Covey in his fantastic book ‘The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People’, in which he describes the sorry state of a person working long and hard to cut down a tree, sweated and worn out from the effort. When it is suggested he take a break and sharpen the saw he replies ‘Goodness I don’t have time to sharpen the saw, I’m far too busy sawing!’ and carries on sawing away with the blunt blade.

India is my favourite place to go and sharpen my saw. Last time I was there several ideas for articles came to me in a matter of minutes and I have since written and published those pieces. There were also spontaneous ideas for workshops, which I have run in this last year. Plans which came to mind so effortlessly in India, have matured now and blossomed into wonderful projects. And of course it’s not just the creative saw which is sharpened but also the physical, emotional and spiritual, through rest, being close to nature and having time to reflect.

Happiness Formula

I appreciate simplicity and this little formula is very dear to me.

‘Eat well, sleep well, think positive thoughts and move your body’

I find it an easy check list to hold in the front of my mind as I go about life.

Eat well – eating what suits my particular body (a vegan diet) and saying no to ‘plastic’ food (junk food).

Sleep well – means good routine and a well rested body that’s raring for the world in the morning.

Think positive thoughts – remembering I always have choice, I can step back and ask: ‘is this train of thought going to take me to a positive destination or a negative one?’, before I jump on it.

Moving the body – energy spent is energy earned, exercise is a fantastic investment!

For me these are the roots of the wellbeing tree, the fruits are clarity of thought, informed decisions, energy, motivation and action.