Modern Living

As I was loading up the washing machine with laundry the other day, I thought how interesting it is that despite all these time saving gadgets so many people, including me still cry ‘there’s just not enough time in the day!’ I wonder … perhaps the time is there, only that it’s gobbled up by all the loud, demanding, ‘urgent’ types of tasks, leaving a few crumbs - precious moments for those activities which really nourish the depths of our being. I’m screening and challenging the ‘urgent’ more now and find most things which seem so imperative can actually wait.

Fastest way to feel down

When we compare ourselves to other people whom we perceive to be happier, more attractive, more educated or affluent, we are sure to feel down instantly. It doesn’t take much pondering over or reflection to get a result.

On the other hand it’s also really easy to feel instantly happy too, just by reminding ourselves of all that we do have right now that is good such as health, supportive family and friends etc.

It helps to remember that everyone has problems and that the grass on the other side is never greener - it’s just a different kind of grass.

Power of Relaxation

Making a conscious effort to stay relaxed in body and mind has more than the obvious benefits. I’m catching myself noticing more opportunities and making better decisions. I’m picking up more information and details than before in a whole range of situations. Body is more clearly able to sense when something is wrong too. To think all that energy was spent on being tense before! What a waste!

‘I always have a choice’

After much practice, this is a phrase I like to say to myself a lot – as creatures of habit we often forget we have choice in our thinking, our actions and decisions. The unconscious pull of our usual patterns of thinking or behaving cause us to do what we always do and hence we end up with the same old results.

To get different results – do things differently – flexibility is key.

Smile

It’s one of my favourite things to do when I’m out and about, one that’s very heart warming when shared with an appreciating stranger. Giving and receiving a smile changes both people. May be the person receiving a smile will go on to smile at someone else, it has a positive impact on the people watching too – and we are always being watched. Sometimes I wonder how long a chain of smiles could be, may be my smile could come all the way round and back to me ; )

Don’t be a Slave

‘Don’t ever be a slave to your body, house, family, money, work or any other externals …’

I’m not sure where I came across this quote. It’s a great reminder though to keep things in perspective and not let any particular aspect of our lives take us over, control us, our time, emotions or thoughts, to the point that we forget ourselves and the other things which are important and beneficial to us and our wellbeing. Doing the best we can and then detaching can help us move away from obsessing and towards self mastery.

Sharpening the Saw

This is a wonderful analogy used by Stephen Covey in his fantastic book ‘The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People’, in which he describes the sorry state of a person working long and hard to cut down a tree, sweated and worn out from the effort. When it is suggested he take a break and sharpen the saw he replies ‘Goodness I don’t have time to sharpen the saw, I’m far too busy sawing!’ and carries on sawing away with the blunt blade.

India is my favourite place to go and sharpen my saw. Last time I was there several ideas for articles came to me in a matter of minutes and I have since written and published those pieces. There were also spontaneous ideas for workshops, which I have run in this last year. Plans which came to mind so effortlessly in India, have matured now and blossomed into wonderful projects. And of course it’s not just the creative saw which is sharpened but also the physical, emotional and spiritual, through rest, being close to nature and having time to reflect.

Happiness Formula

I appreciate simplicity and this little formula is very dear to me.

‘Eat well, sleep well, think positive thoughts and move your body’

I find it an easy check list to hold in the front of my mind as I go about life.

Eat well – eating what suits my particular body (a vegan diet) and saying no to ‘plastic’ food (junk food).

Sleep well – means good routine and a well rested body that’s raring for the world in the morning.

Think positive thoughts – remembering I always have choice, I can step back and ask: ‘is this train of thought going to take me to a positive destination or a negative one?’, before I jump on it.

Moving the body – energy spent is energy earned, exercise is a fantastic investment!

For me these are the roots of the wellbeing tree, the fruits are clarity of thought, informed decisions, energy, motivation and action.

H.A.L.T

This is a great acronym for maintaining physical and emotional health. The idea is to stop whenever you experience any of these and attend to the particular need, ensuring it is satisfied in a healthy way.

Are you …

Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired

then Halt!

Cleaning Up

I’ve been undertaking a little project at home. The strong smells and colours of ordinary detergents and cleaning products had been bugging me for a while, so I decided to investigate alternative options. And I really did have to play detective in our airport sized local superstore. The natural cleaning stuff was neatly tucked away at the end of a totally unrelated aisle. So, one by one as I’ve needed to replenish stocks, I’ve been trying out the plant derived variety and have been really impressed.

Having a strong sense of smell, the first thing that hits me is how pleasant the fragrances are, one kind of antibacterial cleaner has such an amazing smell (I think it’s the bergamot in it) that it was nearly nice to be cleaning. And they work just as well. Another surprising discovery was how cheap the natural stuff is. So it’s been a win-win all round. Amazing what happens when we explore a different route to the same destination!

Work more, Buy more

I was flicking through a health magazine last week while I waited to go in for an appointment and came across an inspiring article. The focus for the piece was the ‘work more, buy more’ modern life style and how an increasing number of people are consciously moving away from this way of living. The shift in thinking stems from a realization that more ‘things’; latest entertainment systems, phones etc don’t always provide more happiness and having to work so hard to earn the necessary money to buy these is very stressful.


It’s something I can identify with after the TV blew up a while ago and I started looking into buying a new one. When I thought about it seriously I realized I hardly ever used it and what I really would value, enjoy and benefit from was an extra weeks holiday this year. It’s made me think of the importance of standing back in situations and asking myself ‘What do I really want here?’

Spring

Since yesterday it seems spring has finally arrived. The sunshine has been glorious. The winter bugs are still harassing people and a couple of friends are down with viruses. This year has been the best ever for me on the bug front, not one sore throat or cough, much less any flu. Two reasons perhaps. Following a vegan diet automatically pushes me towards more fruit and veg because I can’t default to dairy products. More importantly though, I’ve been staying clear of sugar, completely, which I find very liberating. It’s something I simply don’t have to think about. I’m always reminded of an interesting chat I once had with my G.P. He told me how eating refined sugar lowers immune system functioning by 50% for up to 5 hours. That’s staggering!

I think we’ve become conditioned to associate treats with sugary snacks. I still have treats but not ones which will work against my body. A real treat is something my body will appreciate too, not just my mind.

Finding sugar at my place always brings amusement to my friends, as I stand on tiptoes, poking about on the top shelf of the kitchen cabinet with a wooden spoon to find the abandoned sugar pot, so they can enjoy a cup of tea!

Health and the Seasons

The snow has really created a holiday atmosphere with everyone I spoke to or met today. It’s been too long in coming for someone like me.

I have a theory regarding optimum health and the seasons. For the past few years I’ve noticed as soon as it hits 1st September and the days begin to get cooler, an internal alarm clock goes off for me. The colder and darker the days become, the happier and healthier I am. By the December holidays I’m really thriving.

My theory is that our bodies recognise the weather conditions we were born into and it responds positively to them. I’m born in early January at the height of the winter, so the frost and icy temperatures bring out the best in me, making me feel energetic and bright.

I tested my theory out on a friend, at first it seemed completely way off. She likes high temperatures with lots of rain, not really typical kind of UK weather. Delving a little deeper, I discovered she wasn’t born in England at all; she’s actually born in an African country which does have those weather conditions around the date of her birthday.

Bad news, Good news

Joking with a friend last night I related to her my theory about how the TV blew up – ‘go on’ she said ‘Professor Darshan tell me how it happened’ – 'Well, I suspect the relentless negativity of the news was just too much for the poor thing to take – I know it was for me!' - I replied.

I believe it is important to keep informed, especially where there is injustice against innocent people. However there’s more to us human beings than the destruction of each other and the planet. We’re doing good things too and it’s a shame more of these stories don’t show up in the news. So that when we watch it we’re not just bombarded with images and reports of occurring and impending disaster but also uplifted, made to feel a little lighter, given some hope and touched in some way by hearing of the kindness and compassion we’re also capable of.

Sometimes I think if aliens came and visited earth and the first thing they did was to switch on the news they’d probably jump straight back in their spaceships and make the quickest exit possible. That would be such a shame, because the news isn’t a balanced representation of what is really happening in our world.

I think we can all take personal responsibility and search for the ‘good news’ in life too. Better still maybe we can create it through our actions as individuals and through our interaction with others.

Rewards of a Healthy Life Style

I’ve been following a vegan diet now for more years than I can remember and over time I’ve added yoga, meditation and walking into my daily routine. For a few days I’d felt really resistant to taking my B complex vitamin supplement (B12 being a must for vegans). I normally have a blood test once in a while to check B12 and iron levels. So I booked myself in to see the nurse. ‘Before I put this needle in your arm…’ she said (very nice I thought!) ‘… I’ll quickly take your blood pressure as it’s been 2 years since you last visited the surgery.’ It was something over something, so I asked if she could kindly state it in terms that I could relate to, ‘It means you have the blood pressure of a teenager, you must have a really healthy life style.’

Trying to make the most of my visit she also asked if I could stand on the scales. I had a BMI (body mass index) of 20.4 in the healthy range of 20 to 25. When the results of the blood test came back I was right - B12 levels were at the very top of the healthy range, so I’m having a few weeks off my supplement. Although I feel all the benefits of a healthy diet, exercise and relaxation, it was really nice to have it quantified by a health professional. Well worth all the apples and carrots!

Single Tasking

I learnt many things during the few days I spent with my relatives in India. Most of the time they wouldn’t let me help them so I was resigned to sitting and watching while we chatted and they went about their daily chores, they were probably right as I can’t really say I’m competent at cooking over a fire!

This gave me a great opportunity to observe how they do things and go about their tasks. What really stood out is that both the men and women only dealt with one task at a time. Their approach was calm, relaxed and focussed. They seemed to enjoy and savour whatever they were doing. And it’s not like they don’t have a lot to do, the farm is run in a very business like manner in which time keeping, individual responsibility and team work are critical.

Since coming back I’ve applied this rule of single tasking to both personal and professional areas of my life. It was a stretch at first for a super multi tasking modern woman, but the rewards have been great.

Just focusing on the task in hand and giving it all my attention, has resulted in increased satisfaction and focus. I feel calmer and enjoy what I’m doing more. The quality of the results I’m achieving is better too. Before I approach any task I think of what is important to do not just urgent and demanding, so that’s leading to better prioritising. Strangely I’m getting more done without feeling overwhelmed or stressed!

Single tasking is allowing me to live the moment rather than just whizz through it like a passenger on a high speed train.

Here’s a pic of my aunt after we’ve all had breakfast, she’s sorting lentils for lunch, there are things that need doing all around her, but she’s sitting comfortably just focusing on the task in hand. How nice!

Self Esteem

I’ve been looking out through the window these past few days as it’s been raining (and raining and raining!) and wondering how life is a lot like nature. Sometimes the terrain can be flat for as far as the eye can see and the road ahead seems easy and effortless and there are blue skies and bright sunshine to enjoy. Then there are those cold, dark places, where it’s difficult to see and everything seems shrouded in mist and it’s hard to know which way to go or where the road will lead us. Life is constantly changing.

People who have high self esteem have a strong self belief that they can handle whatever happens to them, that they will find a way through, this attitude helps them to navigate through the difficult times. It keeps them moving, so they don’t get stuck and they keep searching for answers and solutions. Added to this is a deeply held belief that they also deserve to be happy and are worthy of having good things happen to them, of achieving their life goals and of having the love and respect of those around them.

These two beliefs give people with high self esteem an inner core of stability and strength regardless of the changes that may happen as they travel their life’s journey.

Strategies for Wellbeing

I’ve been using this simple but powerful strategy for some time now to maintain good health:

Eat Well – work out what kind of diet suits you best, stay clear of foods that don’t agree with you. Create regular times for meals so your body knows when to expect food and doesn’t panic when it’s running low on fuel.

Sleep Well – again it’s about discovering what time best encourages restful sleep for you, dragging the body when it needs rest is damaging. Once you know what bed time ensures you a good night’s sleep stick to it as far as possible.

Move Your Body – Think about what forms of exercise you really enjoy and include them into your schedule on a regular basis. You don’t have to be gym person - mine are morning yoga and evening walks and I feel the difference. Keep it simple and enjoyable.

Think Positive Thoughts – The mind and body are connected and work together as one system. Any thought you have has an immediate effect on your body, causing changes in breathing, heart rate, posture etc. Thinking positive thoughts enhances physical and emotional wellbeing. We don’t always have control over life situations or events but we can choose how we think about them.