Don’t be a Slave

‘Don’t ever be a slave to your body, house, family, money, work or any other externals …’

I’m not sure where I came across this quote. It’s a great reminder though to keep things in perspective and not let any particular aspect of our lives take us over, control us, our time, emotions or thoughts, to the point that we forget ourselves and the other things which are important and beneficial to us and our wellbeing. Doing the best we can and then detaching can help us move away from obsessing and towards self mastery.

Red Roses

It’s been a month now since I came back from holiday. Usually the benefits have worn off by the time the laundry has been done and normal routine re-established. This time though things are different. I’m catching myself noticing things I didn’t see before like the stunning red roses in the neighbour’s garden as I drive off in the morning and the formation of the clouds in the evening sky. The rose bushes are quite mature, yet how come they didn’t enter my line of vision last year?

While on holiday I got into a wonderful habit of relishing the moment, just allowing my senses to soak up whatever I was seeing and hearing at the time. Not to be in my head, distracted by thoughts but to really experience that precious moment. I realized the present - this moment now is actually my entire life as the past and future don’t exist. To really ‘live’ my life I need to place attention fully in the present moment. I’m not ‘living’ my life if my mind is absorbed and lost in memories of the past or plans about the future, both have their place, but they can’t hog centre stage all the time. If I’m living the present moment really well, when I reach that time in the future, it too will get all my attention. It’s a very relaxing approach; I’ve noticed the change in muscle tone especially in my feet. Let’s hope it sticks!

Children and Grieving

My three year old nephew Harry sat on my mums bed while she did the ironing. After a while he asked ‘where are nana’s clothes?’ noticing she was only ironing her own. ‘Doesn’t nana love you anymore?’ his little mind trying to make sense of why his grandfather didn’t live with us now. Finally he computed a solution: ‘lets get a ladder nanny then we can go ‘upstairs’ and bring nana back.’

Harry’s ‘let’s get a ladder and fetch nana back’ idea which has gone on for a few weeks came to a head yesterday as my mum told him ‘people who go upstairs to God don’t come back’, hearing this he went straight over to a wall painting depicting a religious figure and started hitting it repeatedly, a strong action for a little boy who isn’t known to be angry.

I wonder how difficult it must be for him as a small child to square the loss of his grandfather.